Once again, it’s time for one of the two “must attend” local social events of the year. There will be hand shaking, back patting, hugs, and a friendly, “How are you?” along with, “It’s good to see you.”

All this will accompany a pleasant smile at the same time. There will be old and young and in-between ages of males and females. All those attending are in the VIP classification—including you!

You are such an important person that special greeters will greet “the great you” at the door. They will let you enter through your special door. You will even be just ahead of the person behind you.

This is an eating event, so get those taste buds ready. If you’re a light eater, fast for at least a day before attending. If you’re a heavy eater, fast for at least two days. A word to the wise: “Be sure your undergarment has good elasticity.”

Live background music by local celebrities will be featured prior to your eating. You can chit-chat before and after eating in the same area as the music. Dancing is permitted.

Wild rice, chili, potato and chicken noodle soups will be served; key lime, chocolate, apple and pumpkin are some of the pie choices, along with vanilla ice cream. Norwegian juice (coffee), lemonade, water and 1919 Root Beer will be available for your beverage choice.

Ah, yes, all for your presence, so come on down! Put on your eating shoes and boogie on over. The parking lot attendants are waiting for your vehicle. Their motto is, “A full driver is a happy driver.”

Many of you know what I’m referring to, you just don’t know that- this year the annual Soup and Pie Supper at Central Freeborn Lutheran Church (just north of Albert Lea) will be from 4-7 p.m. on Monday, Sept. 26. Be one of the first 600 and you won’t have to worry about running out of food, as we’re planning on 600-plus.

The net proceeds of the Soup and Pie Supper will benefit Jessie Anderson (a seminary student from Central Freeborn Lutheran Church) and SEMCAC (women’s shelter in Albert Lea). Please bring a non-perishable food item or two to help support the local food shelves.

If unable to attend, (you’re in the hospital or at a funeral—your own) a donation would be most appreciated.

Short Shorts:

A. This is a food event with no counting of calories.

B. Gluten-free food items will be available.

C. What you hear here doesn’t have to stay here—you hear?

D. The best thing to come out of Iowa on Interstate 35 will be working in the dining room.

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Bob is a retired AAL (Aid Association for Lutherans) agent, currently working on his master’s degree in Volunteering. His wife, Genie, is a retired RN, currently working on her doctor’s degree in Volunteering. They have two children, Deb in North Carolina, and Dan in Vermont. Bob says if you enjoy his column, let him know. If you don’t enjoy it, keep on reading, it can get worse. Words of wisdom: There is always room for God.