The following was told to me by a very unreliable turkey hunter named Bob Goetz from Austin, MN.

“If a turkey looks up to gobble when it’s raining, it can drown. That is why turkeys don’t gobble when it’s raining.”

He further stated, “If you see a turkey gobbling just as a heavy rain starts, give the turkey CPR if it keels over (pheasants, ducks, grouse, quail or partridge don’t have the above problem).

As an older walleye fisherman or fisherlady, I’m sure you can remember when the walleye limit was six daily in Minnesota. Like everything else changing, the limit has changed (to as few as just one on some lakes).

Three older, very cagy, and very good walleye fishermen have decided to go back to the Good Old Days of six being the limit per person in Minnesota. The following is what they plan on doing Opening Day, Saturday, May 9 in Minnesota:

They will start fishing early A.M. on Mille Lacs Lake and each catch the limit of one walleye. On to Leech Lake and each catch the limit of four walleyes. On to Red Lake and each catch the limit of two walleyes. With their limit of six walleyes as they leave Red lake that same day, they will reminisce the previous annual 39 years of being part of the AAL Fishing Team.

Who are these expert, non-mathematical fishermen? Bob Goetz of Austin, Bob Hanson of Albert Lea, and Paul Proft of Owatonna will proudly claim their ability to think outside the box.

Farmers State Bank is sponsoring a fishing contest from April 1 to November 30. The big prizes will be awarded only to Farmers State Bank customers. You must email a photo of your lunker along with a length and where caught. The three older, very cagy, and very good walleye fishermen (Bob, Bob and Paul) will become Farmers State Bank customers after their Big Lunkers are caught (once again thinking outside the box).

Would you like to meet at least one of the three outside-the-box thinkers? This is your chance. The CEO of Bob Hanson and her VIP lady friends of Central Freeborn Lutheran Church have scheduled a coach bus leaving from behind Slumberland in Albert Lea at 11 a.m. Sunday, June 28 to the performance by the Church Basement Ladies at the Plymouth Playhouse Theater. Prior to napping on the bus between Owatonna and Albert Lea, the bus will stop at KFC Buffet Supper in Owatonna.

The bus, the performance and KFC Buffet are all included in the prices of$53.0 per person paid in advance. Call Genie at 3507-788-0004 or Bob at 507-3737-8655 for reservations.

Reader, the Bus Trip is fact, the rest is fiction!

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Bob is a retired AAL (Aid Association for Lutherans) agent, currently working on his master’s degree in Volunteering. His wife, Genie, is a retired RN, currently working on her doctor’s degree in Volunteering. They have two children, Deb in North Carolina, and Dan in Vermont. Bob says if you enjoy his column, let him know. If you don’t enjoy it, keep on reading, it can get worse. Words of wisdom: There is always room for God.